I am humbled, but while the road ahead is more difficult the journey will surely be more interesting

So I am in Black Belt classes now, and it's an education for sure. I had a pretty good humbling on Monday night that has threatened my "this is definitely where i belong" theory. Let me put it like this- I'm still going to go, but damn Monday basically felt like the nightmares I was having before attending my first white belt introduction. The beatings come swiftly, they are merciless and basically I was left feeling like I never knew what the fuck I was doing in the first place. LoL. The up side is that after 3 more months of this I will probably be surviving again, and 6 months after that I'll be gaining some advantages. It's a crazy steep learning curve, but I gotta just keep on showing up, and keep on processing the lessons.

I now understand why so many new blue belts cling to the relative safety of the intermediate group. While I empathize I can't see myself doing the same. Fear is a killer, but there is nothing to fear. Pride is a bitch- but you gotta get over that if you want to make progress. My plans moving forward remain the same- to split time between intermediate and black belt. I'll begin this with the 3 class per week rotation ratio of 2/1. To begin I'll go 2 x Intermediate and 1 x Blackbelt, then I'll carry it over to 1 x intermediate and 2 x black belt, and then finally 3 x black belt. My intent is to make the full transition within the next 3 months.

We shall see how it goes.