Why? Part 1 of Many

I have been thinking about this lately. Why do I like Jiu Jitsu so much? I have thought about it, and I have come to this conclusion: I like what training brings out of me.

I have this belief that every action in your life causes a reaction that cascades across all facets of your being. Try as you might to resist, you will be changed by each encounter. I believe that each time I face my fight or flight response, and choose fight that it sets off a chain reaction within my personality. The more times I opt for fight, the more I feel confident in that option. Training isn't meant to be dangerous, in fact we go to great pains to make it safe but that doesn't mean engaging another person as a combatant doesn't exercise that part of your brain that yearns for the kill. Somewhere in those dark recesses and folds of gray matter a dormant instinct is awakening, and as awareness sharpens those instincts they become a more active part of day to day life.

I find I am more prone to say "no" when I mean no, and I don't get intimidated like I had occasionally been before training. There may even be a small voice in my psyche that is begging to use new skills in anger. Sort of an open invitation to test myself. Don't get me wrong I'm not looking for fights or anything, but I'm not avoiding them like I used to. For a guy who used to apologize to people that ran into him, this is a nice step forward. Meekness gives way to self assurance and that breeds confidence.